Magic

I wish for magic:
Sparks shooting out the end of a wand
to cause small inconveniences for those who have wronged me
or poof up a bouquet of roses for a forgotten anniversary
or to summon my cell phone from across the room so I don’t have to get up.

I also wish for spells that heal;
mending a broken bone in an instant;
sucking out cancer to hover in a black mass and then disappear;
calming my insides – our insides – so waking up in the morning
isn’t just another disappointment.

I wish for magic for wounded children
and the tired woman who works the streets, hating it,
and for the grandmothers and grandfathers who linger, linger, waiting
for permission to go. I wish for magic that could stop death
and magic that could bring life.

But today I can’t think about that. Today magic can’t help me.
My days are still long and lonely; my friends are in pain.
Babies are dying and people are starving but they are so far away, so far away.
My selfish little life consumes me. So, instead,
I wish for magic to summon the TV remote,
so I don’t have to get up.

Eulogy

Send me to sea on a vessel aflame
Flesh and bones to be seen never again
Only the sea will remember my name

There is a darkness I never could tame
Hatred and death swelling up from within
Send me to see on a vessel aflame

To be something special was never my aim
Weakness of spirit was my greatest sin
Only the sea will remember my name

Where did this hate come from - who can I blame?
I wear the marks of you here on my skin
Send me to sea on a vessel aflame

Day after day I surrender to shame
Knowing there's no way I ever will win
Only the sea will remember my name

Now send me back from wherever I came
Only in death can my journey begin
Send me to sea on a vessel aflame
Only the sea will remember my name